Sacrifice

Sacrifice
A Poem</p>

He went out of his way,
To make someone else’s day.
He sacrificed what he wanted to do,
For he knew men like him were few.
He could’ve done his own thing,
More success his efforts would surely bring.
But he toiled for others gain,
He put in more effort and strain.
He got ingratitude for his selflessness,
They said he did it for his own selfishness.

By:- GSVK

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Respectful Recommendation

'He went out of his way,
to make someone's day
sacrificed what he wanted to do
for he knew men like him were few'   (love it!! great line)
 
'He could have done his [very] own thing
more successes that would surly bring'
   (.....recomend finishing this thought/stanza)
   (......with 2 more lines)
 
'But he toiled for [an]other's gain
[as] he put in more effort and strain
he got ingratitude for his selflessness
They said he did it for selfishness'
 
 I didn't change what you wrote.  I like your idea and your writing.  I only reccomend you drop/ change a few words slightly and add 2 more lines to help it flow a little better for your readers.  I think you write well.  Nice poem!
 
Respectfully,
 
Mocit
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reema's picture

Hi

People are always like that....They just dont wanna appreciate freely...

But history proves that a selfless man goes a long way.

Nice poem...It brought back many memories.

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