when i go to bed, i know i will find no sleep. the deep darkness creeps back into my head. it fills me with misery.......and misery loves company. even sunlight seems lifeless and drab. i can't remember the feeling of its warm rays on my skin. the future seems lost and hope is fading fast. the hole in my heart is ever growing...... the hole in my soul seems to match it is size. confusion, fits of rage, endless tears, and a desire to leave it all behind rush into my brain. my thoughts are to run........ run as fast as i can and hope i can out run the shadows that seem to always be right behind. my feet seem to be moving but i am going no where. the black smoke rolls in like an ghostly mist and engulfs my being. i run no more... there is no need to fight. i have been taken by the shadow. only a hint of my former life linger. i remember the light, the white, the goodness, in tiny flashes from time to time. the darkness has come to claim me... i must embrace it.

shelly May 22, 2009